So i came across this song. And it peaked my interest so i’ve decided to blog about it.
Here are the lyrics: 

Song: Topics
Artist: Nevertheless
Album: In The Making… 

She spent the night out with a guy who gives attention when she cries herself to sleep, I heard her say…
And so she gives him what he wants as long as he can make her feel okay, but she’s not okay

And we avoid the topics, we make the kids have secrets
When they are exposed and everyone else knows
We’ll say we never knew it, that they had a problem
‘Cause if we would have known, we surely would have solved it
But we can’t, it’s too late

He’s skipping classes ’cause he hates them, hopes he passes, not to take them all again, I heard him say…
He escapes them with the pills, the ones he takes to make him feel like he’s okay, but he’s not okay

And we avoid the topics, we make the kids have secrets
And when they are exposed and everyone else knows
We’ll say we never knew it, that they had a problem
‘Cause if we would have known, we surely would have solved it
But we can’t, it’s too late

God, you’ve gotta save us, we hide behind the faces that we make to disguise
The things that were ashamed of and all the ugly things that make us close our eyes
They make us close our eyes,
why do we close our eyes?

We avoid the topics, we make the kids have secrets
When they are exposed and everyone else knows
We’ll say we never knew it, that they had a problem
‘Cause if we would have known, we surely would have solved it

This poses a few questions…

1. What are “the topics” anyway!?  I’m assuming its sexual promiscuity, drugs, cutting, alcoholism, orgies, pornography, abuse, beastiality, incest, etc.  What other ones am i missing?

2. Does your youth ministry avoid the topics? You know, the tough ones that make you feel uncomfortable to talk about with your kids.  

3. If you don’t avoid the topics, do you fly through them crossing your fingers that none of the kids raise their hand during altar call because if one does…

4. Do you know how to handle it if a youth admits to struggling with one of the topics?

I am going to be completely transparent right now and admit to my bloggers that I struggle with question number 4.  Why?  Because I know I don’t quite know how to handle if a youth tells me she is cutting or likes going to orgies or…God forbid, performs in beastiality. Seriously. It sounds crazy but how many youth might be in your youth ministry that struggle with one or more of “the topics” and we either avoid them or skirt around them in order to not have to admit not knowing how to handle them. 

On top of all this, how do we personally (as the leader) and we collectively (as the youth group/ministry) first create an atmosphere safe for exposure? When i was in youth ministry, i hardly felt comfortable admitting what I struggled with regardless of “the topic” being discussed during the night. I was afraid of judgement. How sad. Fear of being judged by your own brothers and sisters. So we create these masks to wear and pretend things are okay. 

What do you think? Do you have a story? Do tell, maybe it will help others (like me) figure out how to handle certain “topics”.

I know that I personally want to learn more about how to handle these kinds of situations and how to counsel those involved. If anyone has any resources i could look into, I would appreciate it. (:

Thanks.

keep smiling.be love

*Photo: “The Art of Pretending” by Nonnetta, Deviant Art.

I know, I know… It’s been a month since my last post. So much for that resolution lol. just kidding. Things have been quite busy… i do however want to post more, its just finding the time. I honestly dont know how Adam McLane and Billy Hartz does it…

* Our youth ministry’s annual youth retreat is coming up… Stand:Let Nothing Move You. You can click there and check out the website. We’ve got a few videos up already, including an amazing video made by Jesus Torres. It’s the first weekend in March (not on my birthday this year!). Much has been done and much still to do. I’m in charge of the prayer/worship station room. No labyrinth this year. As of now i believe i have about 20 worship stations for the kids to interact with. About a third of them hve to do with the theme. Then there is worship. Having to put together 5 sets, designate worship leaders, learn new songs, leave room for changes, etc. So far i’m proud of myself for meeting personal deadlines on time. It gave me more room to help out with the decorations committee and research things for other committees. This Friday i’ll be personalizing the souvenir for this year which is pretty awesome.  I can’t say it here in case any of the youth stumble upon my blog before the retreat (i doubt it though lol). And posting about worship stations only reminds me about how much i want to put all the ones i’ve borrowed, revamped and created on here as well… hmm, in due time (crosses fingers!) lol

* I sent in my application for a different job. After working with kids for 11 years it might be time for a change. We’ll see how that goes. A few of my blog readers know about it. I dont want to get into it on here yet for various reasons lol.

* I’ve been “sick” the past couple of days. rar! I dont know exactly what to call it. I ended up with laryngitis once again after working all Saturday long in the youth pastor’s attic. lol This is the second time it happened. Unfortunately this time, accompanying it is massive amounts of sinus pressure and it’s making my jaw and ears throb.

* My teacher at work has been out and those of you who follow me on Twitter know about the chaos that has ensued due to faulty substitution. For those of you who haven’t: Monday, they sent me a non-English speaking (and non-English understanding) teacher (so you can imagine the difficulties in that) and Tuesday, it was Miss “Teacher Superior”. She walked right in and looked at my stuff at the teacher’s desk and said, “oh. you already have your things there.” And she stood there waiting for me to remove it. Then she tried to meticulously follow the class schedule, not quite understanding me when i tried letting her know of the already instilled flexible routine because let’s be honest here! Class schedules are just for show. Mine, for instance, says breakfast is from 8:20-8:30, then large group from 8:30-8:45. But you have to be lenient to the fact that by the time i bring in the bus kids, its already 8:45am! lol so today when they came in then and sat down for breakfast, she looked disapprovingly and said, “oh really? i didnt know it was still breakfast time. it’s supposed to be over at 8:30. well i guess they have to eat as well.” what?  lol it was crazy. Where was Mike Kupferer when i needed a good sub!? ;)

* Right now i’m listening to Red’s newest album which i just purchased from iTunes: Innocence & Instinct (Bonus Track Version). I’m loving it more than i intended to.  I’m not privy to disliking the “screaming” and that remains the same, but there aren’t as much ear-splitting roars as i thought there would be which is nice. This album is definitely has a great focus on the redemption theme which is awesome. If you don’t mind this kind of music, i highly recommend this album (the Bonus Track Version especially).

* Speaking of recommendations: I handed in my first book review (”Kiss” by Ted Dekker and Erin Healy) for Youth Ministry Exchange (amazing site if you’ve never checked it out). Hopefully I did okay. It was challenging and alot of fun honestly. (:

Well that’s about it for now.

I can promise you my next post will be very soon. (:

keep smiling.be love